Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Disney Cheapquel Mad-Libs!

One of my favorite posts by the SaveDisney guys has to be this article by Diego Vega, which details how to write a Disney cheapquel. It is a hilarious, but sad, commentary on the state of 2d animation at the Mouse House...


If we wrote it as a "Mad Lib", it would go something like this:

New sequel involves parents (often aged Disney stars, but not always) and a child (usually next generation, though sometimes same from original movie). Parent nags the child with too many rules concerning any rule, and keeps secrets about any secret from the child. The child is ridiculed (real or imagined) by siblings or peers. The child rebels against the parent and proceeds to disobey the parent's rules because of a self-centered reason. The child makes a deal with an adversary to commit a rebellious act of betrayal. Child finds new or old love interest. Everything goes wrong, big climax ensues, adversary is defeated, usually by falling into a treacherous location. Child apologizes to the parent while parent apologizes to the child, thus maintaining family generational détente. Bland generic pop artists sing over end credits.

So, let's play "Mad Libs"! Just fill in the blanks and you've got a sequel.


Little Mermaid II
PARENT: Ariel
CHILD: Melody
RULE: not crossing the wall to the ocean
SECRET: being a former mermaid
SIBLING/PEER: guests at ball
DISOBEYS: goes over the wall into the sea
SELF-CENTERED TRAIT: her name's on a locket
ADVERSARY: Morgana
BETRAYAL: steal King Triton's trident
LOVE INTEREST: prince and merboy
FALL LOCATION: in a block of ice

Lady and the Tramp II
PARENT: Tramp
CHILD: Scamp
RULE: stay in the yard
SECRET: once being a street dog
DISOBEYS: run away
SELF-CENTERED TRAIT: he wants to run wild and free
ADVERSARY: Buster the junkyard dog
BETRAYAL: Steal Jim Dear's picnic chicken
LOVE INTEREST: Angel
SIBLING/PEER: triplet dog sisters
FALL LOCATION: junk falls on Buster

Lion King II
PARENT: Simba
CHILD: Kiara
RULE: Stay in Pride Rock
SECRET: Timone and Pumba are shadowing Kiara
DISOBEYS: go to Outlands
SELF-CENTERED TRAIT: she wants to hunt by herself
ADVERSARY: Sira/Kovu
BETRAYAL: date the enemy
LOVE INTEREST:Kovu
SIBLING/PEER: Kovu's siblings
FALL LOCATION: into the river

An Extremely Goofy Movie
PARENT: Goofy
CHILD: Max
RULE: brushing, combing, and wearing clean underwear
SECRET: who is Max's mother
DISOBEYS: publicly rejecting his father
SELF-CENTERED TRAIT: live his own life
ADVERSARY: Bradley Uppercrust III
BETRAYAL: tricks Dad into joining Gammas
LOVE INTEREST: Beret girl/Sylvia the Librarian
SIBLING/PEER: Kids in college lecture class
FALL LOCATION: from sky after puncturing blimp

Return to Neverland
PARENT: Wendy
CHILD: Jane
RULE: not yelling at her brother
SECRET: the evacuation
DISOBEYS: slam the door
SELF-CENTERED TRAIT: she's acting like a grown-up control freak
ADVERSARY: Captain Hook
BETRAYAL: give Peter's treasure to Hook
LOVE INTEREST: Father
SIBLING/PEER: Lost Boys
FALL LOCATION: from the mast thru ship into ocean